borg9's topics - tribe.net

2009

2009-06-25T18:50:37Z

isn't this the year for borg9 to rise again, to rise as what I don't know, but....

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

Happy Belated Birthday to Bud Ugly courtesy of Tribe.net and Network Solutions!

2008-08-19T18:24:10Z

OK... Tribe.net and Network Solutions are only responsible for the belated part.

Anyway... I figure Bud could use a nice inspirational video to get him psyched up for the rest of his new year...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wwdOX19_ETI

posted in borg9 - 5 replies

SILENCE! HE SPEAKS!

2008-08-18T06:02:10Z

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oEhKZNQlJrY

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

a significantly important video

2008-08-03T05:21:13Z

http://youtube.com/watch?v=-8E8trKZGbE

posted in borg9 - 4 replies

borg9 in The Castro (Theater, ... whew!)

2008-07-03T21:56:40Z

IMPORTANT MESSAGE: from one of borg9's minions:

Hi friends, some I've not seen for awhile, all of whom I believe might
actually enjoy what I'm proposing. Monday July 7th from 6PMish til
around 8:45 we'll be drinking at Zeitgeist <http://sfweekly.com/bestof/2001/award/best-bicycle-bar-27487/ > in the backyard. Then we'll walk to one of the most brilliant and
comforting places in the world, The Castro Theater <http://www.castrotheatre.com/p-list.html >. Unbelievably this magical edifice is sometimes taken for granted.
When's the last time you were there? I hope I die before the Castro
does. Playing at the Castro is my favorite movie, Sam Peckinpah's The
Wild Bunch. Not everyone would get this pure and simple work of
unadulterated genius and spiritual profundity, but I think you would.
Afterwards, out to a local watering hole to drink more (Zeitgeist if
no one has a better idea.) I know it's short notice. Many of you might
need to work, or can't make it into the city, or............. While
reflecting on the tentative nature of everything, it struck me that
such an experience should not be allowed to pass. I've seen The Wild
Bunch in a variety of truncated versions as well as the 1 or 2 pretty
complete "Director's Cut" versions probably 50 times in the last 32
years. Over half those viewings were in a theater. I just can't say
how long we'll be able to see such a big screen masterpiece on an
actual big screen. Please join me if you can. I'll be on a bike - I'm
intending to imbibe a little good whisky.

I took the liberty of a small mass mailer so you can see who else
might come. Many of you know one another, some may not. I've only
invited people that i know and like that I believe (whether you've
already seen the movie or not) would really get it. The discussion
over drinks afterwards is all Peckinpah, all the time! You're
certainly welcome to invite anyone else - I only ask that you consider
seriously whether or not they might enjoy this singular movie. I very
subjectively culled through my address book and only invited people i - think- will enjoy this movie. I probably left out some who might have
really dug it - my apologies. If you don't like the movie, please
don't say anything!! One of the best and simplest types of events I
recall from my event organizing infancy in the Suicide Club in the
late 70's was when someone loved (hated or was dumbfounded by) a
particular film and listed it as an event. People would come, see
something thought provoking or beautiful (or cheesy & dumb, depending)
and afterwards they would discuss the film. It was a pretty cool, low
key way to enjoy an evening out and to learn something new. Hope to
see you. cheers -J

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

Finally!!!

2008-01-23T04:37:00Z

http://imdb.com/title/tt0489282/

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

seeking anyone whos ever helped build the man at BM for something different.

2007-09-25T17:46:14Z

http://tribes.tribe.net/headstandman

in '08 we will put up an Inverted Man *outside* the BRC perimeter in a small legal Free Camp.

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

About the other theme...

2007-09-18T07:36:04Z

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/09/14/BARUS4SLF.DTL

"The sheriff said he'll work to see that more deputies patrol next year's festival. "The victims out here have a right to a good, strong investigation," Skinner said. "And that's going to take more manpower."

The American Dream

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

A call to arms (if arms means how stupid can we get)

2007-09-05T15:45:58Z

Here is your mission. No mission statement necessary.

There is a theme "American Dream"
There is a medium : this goofball tribe and photoshop.

I want you kids to get out there and do some magic. I know
you can. When I sober up and get back to the fast computer
with CS3 on it, I am gonna put the pudding where the mouth
is.

Make Borg9 proud.
Because if you can't, we are drinking somewhere else.

Remember that punks need smashing now matter how cute or vulnerable.

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

borg9 ANNOUNCES 2008 THEME

2007-09-05T04:23:09Z

Following on the unrivaled successes of:

- 2005 - "I'm Gonna Smash You Punks!"
- 2006:- "Does My Ass Look Fat To You?"
- 2007 - "What? You're Still Here??!?"

Dear Leader, Source of Sunshine, Happiness and Strength Through Bacon, The One True One, borg9, was, on this day, heard to utter....

"NOT GUILTY!"

Yes, minions, recognizing that while everyone is innocent until tried, the best you hope for from a jury pool of retired Chinese ladies, McDonalds employees, and postal workers is the moral ambiguity of "Not Guilty!". So don't click on that porn site, stop writing in your blog, and you dare don't get involved, because ALL OF THIS WILL BE USED AGAINST YOU!

posted in borg9 - 5 replies

All praise the leader

2007-08-04T22:44:57Z

A Season In Hell #13: Theme From A Season In Hell

Sometimes I get nostalgic. I moved a lot in my life, an average of once every two years. I went to ten schools in thirteen years (K-12), and the one thing that was a constant was music. Music and TV. The two things that were constant were music and TV. And family. The three…three things that were constant were music, TV, family and the ever increasing amount of sarcasm that made it into my humor.

I made it down for the weekly KFJC (http://kfjc.org) staff meeting this past week, for the first time in about seven years. I’m hoping to do a show a month there. I’ll keep you posted.

With that I bring you this latest episode. If you’re a fan of nighttime police dramas, then you’ll enjoy this show.

Also, I recently saw Radio Moscow play 12 Galaxies in SF (http://www.12galaxies.com/flash.html). Check out their MySpace page, and support live music. I also have a few San Francisco artists in this show, including punk polka faves Polkacide, the Japanese yodeling cowboy Toshio Hirano, and Sesame Street cover band Cookie Mongoloid; you’ve never heard anything like them before.

Check out my podomatic site here: http://johnhell.podomatic.com
My MySpace site here: http://myspace.com/mrjohnhell
My new Facebook site here: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=616519637
My blog here: http://freeradiosf.com/blog/22

Whew, that’s a lot of crap I have online.

Email me at mrjohnhell@yahoo.com

Thanks for listening.

Set list:

Barney Miller Theme, from Television's Greatest Hits, Vol. 3: 70's & 80's
http://www.amazon.com/Televisions-Greatest-Hits-Vol-70s/dp/B000000GOO
Beer is Better Than Girls Are: Artless
http://krucoff.com/2006/04/top-music-9-artless-band-of-mykel.html
In Heaven There Is No Beer: Polkacide http://www.polkacide.com/
Jump In Line: Harry Belafonte http://www.belafonte-asiteofsites.com/

Up & Down: Cookie Mongoloid http://www.wearemongoloid.com/cookie/index.html
Sanford & Son Theme, from Television's Greatest Hits, Vol. 3: 70's & 80's
T For Texas: Toshio Hirano http://www.toshiohirano.com/
25 Minutes To Go: Johnny Cash http://www.johnnycash.com/

James Brown Ate My Bagpipe: Taxi Chain http://www.taxichain.com/
Street of San Francisco, from Television's Greatest Hits, Vol. 3: 70's & 80's
Psychobilly Freakout: Reverend Horton Heat http://www.reverendhortonheat.com/

Fuse: Radio Moscow http://www.myspace.com/radiomoscow
Pick Me Up: Dinosaur Jr. http://www.dinosaurjr.com/

Morning Theft: Jeff Buckley http://www.jeffbuckley.com/
Barretta Theme, from Television's Greatest Hits, Vol. 3: 70's & 80's
Theme From Cyrano/Mr. Tambourine Man: William Shatner
http://www.williamshatner.com/
Up In Smoke Reprise: Cheech & Chong http://www.cheechandchong.com/

Music bed: Zabriskie Point. Brought to you by The Pink Floyd, in memory of Michelangelo Antonioni, dead at 94, on Monday, July 30, 2007
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zabriskie_Point_(film)

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

An insurrection

2007-07-31T03:44:23Z

The deep plazas suck. Can the dissatisfied dis-placed people of BRC unite under the borg9 banner and migrate our nomadic asses to some other place on the playa and smash some punks along the way?

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

Listen you punks!

2007-07-28T22:49:36Z

http://johnhell.podomatic.com

A Season In Hell #12: Waiting for the Man

***Warning*** Because of the need for server space, I will be removing Episode #1 and possibly #2 by Thursday, August 2nd, 2007. You have been warned.

I spent a year in DC last week. I was there for an education conference, and I had the luxury of seeing the New York Dolls perform at the legendary 9:30 Club. The club has been open since the 70’s, but obviously in a very different location. What a great club; amazing sound and stage. The Dolls were incredible too. Only Sylvain and Johanson are alive from the original lineup, but the rest of the band seriously kicked ass. They have a new CD out, go get it.

I got to walk “The Mall”, which is the federal gov’t area. Quite impressive, even if you don’t like the schmuck who lives in the white house right now.

This week I include some early NY Dolls. I also have some live tracks from Tom Waits with the Kronos Quartet doing the theme to my favorite show: “The Wire”. If you haven’t seen this great police drama on HBO, you’re missing the best written show on TV. Some live Lou Reed shows up near the end of the podcast today. A real rarity is included in the guise of Neil Young. He never released “Chrome Dreams”, but all of the music made it on to something eventually. This version of “Powderfinger” never did.

I hope you enjoy the show. Please leave a comment on the website: http://johnhell.podomatic.com and tell your friends about thee show by clicking the “send to friends” link on the page.

Thanks.

John Hell

Set List:

“Way Down In The Hole”: Tom Waits & Kronos Quartet with Greg Cohen on bass.
From the “Healing the Divide” release.
Get the CD here: http://www.amazon.com/Healing-Divide-Concert-Peace-Reconciliation/dp/B000F3AJTO

“Looking for a Kiss”: New York Dolls http://www.nydolls.org/
“A Change is Gonna Come”: The Gits http://www.thegits.com/
“Senorita”: Ovarian Trolley http://www.trouserpress.com/entry.php?a=ovarian_trolley

“Powderfinger”: Neil Young, from the unreleased “Chrome Dreams”. Get it here: http://www.tapecity.org/showthread.php?t=7626&highlight=chrome+dreams
You have to register for this site, which is free.
“The Mercy Seat”: Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds http://www.nickcaveandthebadseeds.com/
“Do You Take This Man?”: Diamanda Galas http://www.diamandagalas.com/

“Shady Lane”: Slim Cessna’s Auto Club http://www.slimcessnasautoclub.com/news/index.asp
“Home Sweet Mobile Home”: The New Duncan Imperials http://www.newduncanimperials.com/

“Ain’t No Friend Of Mine:” Mono Men http://www.monomen.net/
“I’m Waiting For My Man”: Lou Reed, 12-26-72 http://www.loureed.org/00/index.html

“I Want You”: Peter Frampton & Toto http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sgt._Pepper's_Lonely_Hearts_Club_Band_(film)
“Up In Smoke Reprise”: Cheech & Chong http://www.cheechandchong.com/

As always, if you’re interested in any of my live music, I’m always up for a trade. Take a look at my list, and send me an email at mrjohnhell@yahoo.com

The live list: http://db.etree.org/johnhell

Support live and local music!

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

A Season In Hell #7

2007-05-31T21:20:37Z

Continuing to be the whore that I am:

It's that time once again my friends. I give to you all A Season In Hell #7: The Art of Getting Jumped.

There's a lot packed into this show:
Presidential Speeches
Presidential Singing
Jim Fourniadis doing his best Keith Moon impersonation
Public Enemy soaking up the whipped cream
and a lesson or two to boot.

As usual, if you're not already checking out the show through iTunes, you can go to my homepage here:
http://johnhell.podomatic.com

Or subscribe through iTunes here:
http://johnhell.podOmatic.com/rss2.xml

On my homepage please click the "Send to friends" link and email my show to everyone you know, even grandma likes this stuff.

Thanks so much for supporting my fanatical devotion/obsession to music and the strong desire I horde sharing it with.

Email me at mrjohnhell@yahoo.com
http://www.myspace.com/mrjohnhell

Read my blog here:
http://freeradio.com/blog/22

Support live music in your neighborhood.

Enjoy.

jh

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

I want to be the first to...

2007-05-28T19:38:14Z

Welcome Daria Goldie into the world (of tribe.net).

i'm taking bets on how long it is before Pete teaches her to say "smash you punks"

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

A Season In Hell #5

2007-05-24T22:27:53Z

A Season In Hell #5(Don’t Worry) If There’s A Hell Below We’re All Gonna Go

You can hear my latest podcast online here:
http://johnhell.podomatic.com/

Or you can get it on your iTunes or other online music player here:
http://johnhell.podOmatic.com/rss2.xml

This week I start off the show highlighting local San Francisco band Pebble Theory. They’re a great four piece that puts on a tantalizing live show. They’re having a CD release party at Bottom of the Hill in SF, on Saturday, May 26th. Check out their new CD “Air”. Also, you can check them out online at http://pebbletheory.com, and on Myspace at http://myspace.com/pebbletheory

The Finklestein Shit Kid: Cheech & Chong
Up in Smoke: Cheech & Chong
Air: Pebble Theory

Animal: Pebble Theory
Picabo Who?: Free Kitten
Sugar Kane: Sonic Youth

Steppin’ In Her I. Miller Shoes: Betty Davis
(Don’t Worry) If There’s A Hell Below We’re All Gonna Go: Curtis Mayfield
Consternation: Erik Friedlander

Redebe: Johnny Dyani
Green River: Creedence Clearwater Revival
History Lesson-Part II: Minutemen
Love Whip: Reverend Horton Heat

Step Right Up: Tom Waits
Auf Wiedersehen: Cheap Trick
Up In Smoke Reprise: Cheech & Chong

Enjoy.

John Hell

posted in borg9 - 4 replies

A Season In Hell #6

2007-05-24T22:23:03Z

Howdy "radio" fans.

A Season In Hell, Episode 6 is up and ready for your
enjoyment.

Thanks for listening. It's not radio, but at least I
get to feed my jones a little bit. I really appreciate
Podomatic. They make it incredibly easy.

See the website here:
http://johnhell.podomatic.com

Subscribe to it through iTunes here:
http://johnhell.podOmatic.com/rss2.xml

Tell your friends that Hell is here to stay.

jh

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

enjoy...

2007-02-06T00:33:02Z

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/2698507.stm

you can thank david capurro for this.

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

borg9 shall smash this test

2007-02-05T19:39:38Z

http://netherlands.tribe.net/recommendation/The-False-Guru-Test/netherlands/b9e835a4-a88a-4a4a-988c-b951487b28c7?nextpage=http%3A%2F%2Fsanfrancisco.tribe.net%2Flocal

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

2007-01-31T20:12:23Z

Happy birthday oh Beloved One!

posted in borg9 - 7 replies

Should we sue each other

2007-01-31T01:50:18Z

or just leave it to the original borg and pick up the pieces?

posted in borg9 - 8 replies

Glad to see someone got creative

2006-11-30T17:53:35Z

http://link.brightcove.com/services/link/bcpid203712201/bclid192880073/bctid335844850

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

Let's save Iran!

2006-11-24T00:14:36Z

Applying incredible hippie technology that can stop entire armies:

http://sanfrancisco.tribe.net/event/Global-Orgasm-For-Peace-Day-DEC-22/san-francisco-ca/56898325-a0e9-4a6a-a388-392cf4a7dc4c

posted in borg9 - 6 replies

Smash Two Punks

2006-11-19T09:47:53Z

I smash two punks in the morning.
I smash two punks at night.
I smash two punks in the afternoon, it makes me feel alright
I smash two punks in time of peace, and two in time of war
I smash two punks before I smash two punks,
And then I smash two more

posted in borg9 - 7 replies

If you are a male

2006-11-16T03:40:14Z

try reading this webpage without crossing your legs

http://www.funlinked.com/testicle/

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

borg9 Announces The 2007 Burning Man Theme

2006-10-16T00:06:13Z

Never one to wait until all the rebar at Home Depot is gone, The Beautiful Voice of borg9 shouts out from his emaculate 44' long RV....

"What, you're still here?"

posted in borg9 - 11 replies

this might actuall sell

2006-09-16T21:08:35Z

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=19581

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

I am so impressed

2006-09-08T16:10:26Z

In my many months of absence from my regular attendance of this group, it is entirely surprising that it's still here.
Excellent work. You should all be commended for your efforts in sheer BORG9ness.

Be hereby warned that a second deity is being anointed to the high ranks of the church. It will all become perfectly clear during September which heretofore will be know as Shatner Month. See it at the Dark Room on Sundays in September.

You saw it coming and yet you still did not duck.

posted in borg9 - 7 replies

Get me the hell outta here!! I was played by virgin SCUM

2006-08-29T17:30:37Z

Using my camping gear..blow me off..call from 447 zone all cellular choppy " Oh Were still Shoppin we will be a little late..
Im in east bay will reward and cover gas any saintly art freak who will rescue me..ASAP usual stuff-bike-project materials and my old playa schooled and played ass..costumes boooooze...poi and boots..
SOS and stuff....
alchemy 510 938-2130

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

Now that it has gotten all quiet around here...

2006-08-26T18:34:07Z

It's time to ask that oh-so pressing question....

DOES MY ASS LOOK FAT TO YOU???!??

OH, and by the way... all those tribe people who put up "I'm gone to burp the man" avatars... LET"S ROB THEIR APARTMENTS!

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

borg9 Announces The 2006 Burning Man Theme

2006-06-20T12:04:51Z

Many have asked me how I learned it, so now I have to tell the truth... and where else to but here, where it all began.

Two nights ago I was having a a wonderful dream. It was at a high society dinner party, much like the ones we regularly attend here in San Francisco. Beautiful colors, interesting people, delightful food. Suddenly borg9 enters the room, looks around until he spots me, runs over and begins beating me with a cue stick while shouting,

"DOES MY ASS LOOK BIG TO YOU?"

posted in borg9 - 72 replies

Literary Quote of the Week

2006-06-20T01:21:28Z

"A passing [Soviet] T-62 [tank] had begun to rotate its barrel our way, like a slow child trying to make friends. "Drive!" I shouted to Sakha."

From "Absurdistan", by Gary Shteyngart

How would you continue the story?

posted in borg9 - 8 replies

Borg9 manifested as Cabbie, Bad Movie Nite....ODIN!!!!

2006-05-31T22:10:10Z

July 30th at the Dark Room Theater:

Escape from NY

With your hosts Pete Goldie, GeekBoy and Jim Fourniadis.

Borg9 holds court once again as Kurt Russell gets an overdue makeover from the boy who wore tennis shoes, to an "Eastwood-esque" action hero in John Carpenter's wacky near future prison break funfest: Escape From NY!!!

Let the smashing begin!!

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

Inspiration to further the cause...

2006-04-02T02:58:30Z

In researching for more info on Google today the book by Jessica Weiner "Do I look fat in this?" I came across this article posted below by Oscar Madison. I thought this would be great inspiration for any of you going to burningman to help in preparation of this year's theme: "Does my ass look big to you?" I think that Oscar would be pleased to know that we here at borg9 would suggest would-be askers of the question to bring an anvil or a hammer and get ready to smash!

Enjoy...

Relationships 101: "Do I look fat?"
A lesson in how to answer "the question"

Here is a bit of human experience that seems to fall into the “things everyone has to learn for her- or him- self” category: how to handle the question from wife/girlfriend, etc., “Do I look fat?” And yet the pain of that relearning process seems so avoidable. We all know the question will be asked. Why wait around unprepared only to be caught like a deer in the headlights when it finally comes up:

♀: Do I look fat?
♂: No, not at all.
♀: I’ve gained weight though, haven’t I?
♂: Uh... since when?
♀: Oh, so I have gained weight since you first met me.
♂: Well, I don’t...
♀: What you’re saying is, I do look fat.
♂: No!
♀: Well, you just said I’ve gained weight.
♂: But you don’t look fat!
♀: I’ve gained weight, “but I don’t look fat.” Lovely.
♂: I didn’t say that.
♀: So I do look fat!
♂: ....?....!
♀: If you think I look fat, why don’t you just come out and say so?

Of course, no wife or girlfriend wants to be told she looks fat. Quite the contrary! Yet it seems as though she is programmed to conduct razorlike, determined cross examinations that will not end until she has broken the man's will and extracted a "confession."

Sometimes this examination may start in a more sly and subtle way:

♀: Do these clothes look tight on me?
♂: No they look great.
♀: You aren’t looking!
♂: (Looking up.) I am. Those clothes look great on you.
♀: I must have gained weight since I first bought them. They feel a lot tighter.
♂: Maybe they shrunk in the wash.
♀: So they do look tight.
♂: No...
♀: But you just said they look like they’ve shrunk in the wash –
♂: – yeah, but –
♀: – when I know for a fact they haven’t.
♂: ....?....!
♀: If you think I look fat in these clothes, why don’t you just come out and admit it!

The first mistake most guys make is to think they can correct their mistakes for next time by analyzing these conversations to figure out where they went off the rails. Clearly, in both versions of the conversation, ♂ gets himself into trouble by seeking a clarification (“since when?”) or offering helpful information (suggestion re clothes shrinkage), breaking the cardinal rule of responding to cross examination (never volunteer information!).

But on closer inspection, any attempt to respond to these questions straightforwardly is vulnerable to variants of the impossible, checkmate cross examination question: "was I fatter then or am I fatter now?"

♀: Do I look fat?
♂: No, not at all.
♀: I’ve gained weight though, haven’t I?
♂: Definitely not.
♀: You think I looked like this when we first met?
♂: Like what?
♀: Fat.
♂: I didn’t say you looked fat.
♀: Well, I’ve obviously put on weight since we first met.
♂: I haven’t noticed that.
♀: So basically, I’ve always looked fat enough that a few extra pounds doesn’t make any difference.

Nor is it possible to head things off by making assertions to the contrary:

♀: Do I look fat?
♂: No, no you look thin.
♀: Too thin?
♂: No, you look just right.
♀: But if I put on some weight, I wouldn’t look “just right.”
♂: Sure you would.
♀: So it doesn't matter to you whether I look fat or thin?
♂: No, not at all.
♀: If I looked totally fat right now, you would say I looked "just right."
♂: That's right.
♀: Well, you just did say I looked "just right."
♂: Um... yeah?
♀: So you think I look fat.

The mistake is not the fact that ♂ gives wrong answers to key questions in the “do I look fat?” cross examination. The mistake is trying to answer the questions at all.

Listen up, all you ♂s. You can avoid all these problems whenever you sense you have gotten within a mile of the "do I look fat?" line of questions, by following three simple rules:

1) Never, never, under any circumstances say the word “fat” – or for that matter, “heavy,” “gain” or even the seemingly neutral “weight.” Once you let yourself get drawn into a discussion concerning the weight of the human body, the battle is lost.

2) You should act as though you are a candidate running for the office of husband or boyfriend, and that “do I look fat?” is being asked by a reporter who is out to get you. Your one task is to stay on a single, simple campaign theme: “You are beautiful in both spirit and body, and every day I strive to remain worthy of your love.” Therefore, don’t answer any question directly at all. Do not say “yes” or “no.” No matter how much you are goaded, stay on message.

3) Be a walking thesaurus with at least a dozen words for “physically attractive” at your disposal.

♀: Do I look fat?
♂: You look beautiful.
♀: That’s not what I asked you. Don’t you think I’ve gained weight?
♂: Well, all I can say is you’re really hot.
♀: Stop avoiding the question. Do I look fat or not?
♂: You’re totally babe-o-licious.
♀: What you’re saying is, I do look fat.
♂: You were winsome when I first met you, and you’re even more so now.
♀: Winsome?
♂: Drop-dead gorgeous.
♀: Oh, so I wasn’t as good looking when you first met me, is that what you’re saying?
♂: That’s right. You’re even more lovely now.

With this strategy – which I call “the stonewall” – you can wear her down until the subject changes from weight to beauty, a more ethereal characteristic. Note how it’s harder to turn "then-versus-now" loveliness into an insult. Even the more persistent ♀ who is frustrated and annoyed that you never addressed the weight question has nothing on you but the fact that you said she’s beautiful. You hold onto the moral high ground.

The stonewall is the only safe approach I have seen in all my years of experience. If you have something better, I’m all ears.

UPDATE: "Very funny post. Are you trying to tell me I look fat?"

**

# posted by Oscar Madison @ 10:42 AM

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

In another Borg9 first

2006-04-01T18:13:01Z

Showing great leadership, no fear and only hope for the future our almighty leader has vaulted into the heavens, reaching out to the worldwide community to spread this year's theme (with a little Brazlian twist)

http://borg9.tribe.net/photos/c7199f92-0b5a-49f2-b68a-6103720caaaf

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

He's up!

2006-03-30T23:02:17Z

Right over our heads. The second ever Brazilian Astronaut. Not as good-looking as the first one, but that was a tough act to follow anyway.

http://noticias.uol.com.br/ultnot/album/0603astronauta_album.jhtm?abrefoto=12

posted in borg9 - 4 replies

We gotta go

2006-01-06T15:00:07Z

Inspired by Our Glorious Leader, borg9, this tribe has created art that inspires and respires. Unfortunately, the former frat boys who run his space have decided to claim our thing as their own:

Tribe terms of service:

"5. Content

We do not claim ownership of the content you post or otherwise provide to the Service. However, you hereby grant, and agree to grant as an effect of posting or otherwise providing content, to the public for non-commercial purposes and to Tribe, a perpetual license to use, copy, distribute, display, perform, and modify any and all content that you post on the Service. This license cannot be withdrawn. Your use of the service is in consideration for this license, we will not otherwise pay you for your content. You represent and warrant that you have not granted and will not grant any rights inconsistent with this license. "

At any moment, the entire borg9 cult could be co-opted and the wonderous imagery stolen from us and sold to Sony and Apple. We gotta take the good stuff down before that travesty occurs.

Fortunately, through our advanced intellect and foresight, geekboy and I have parked the borg9.com domain. Who's got time to hustle up us a website?

posted in borg9 - 4 replies

Let's just cut to the chase.

2005-12-29T19:14:43Z

http://borg9.tribe.net/photos/3fe1c5f8-a27b-472a-881a-4b96307559dd

posted in borg9 - 6 replies

new search engine

2005-12-17T01:33:45Z

http://www.logogle.com/ggl.php?hl=ja&lo=borg9

posted in borg9 - 3 replies

brog9 and opus dei

2005-11-29T21:21:50Z

i offer my pain, this headache, to brog9.

opus dei-- that means "for smashing" in latin, right????

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

I am so pleased...

2005-11-28T19:53:52Z

... that yesterday they started selling "Buy Nothing Today" T-shirts at The Gap.... with borg9's picture on them!

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

Science!

2005-11-17T20:13:07Z

I am on my way to an interesting pharmacology seminar titled:

Controlling Check Point Control.

Nothing is left to chance to this person. It is a worldview of peace, harmony and blissful predictability. It's too bad centrally planned economies are out of fashion these days.

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

borg9 Movie Night! w/ Hal, geekboy and Goldie!

2005-10-29T21:15:26Z

POSEIDON ADVENTURE, The !!!!

It's full of giants of bad cinema, plus a mighty big boat! This is the huge Irwin Allen flick that Hal Robins is just itching to capsize and sink. HELP BRING IT DOWN TO OUR LEVEL! (i.e. lower than whale shit!)

POSEIDON ADVENTURE, The !!!!

See Shelly Winters profess undying (uh, well...) love for borg9!

See Leslie Nielson standing on his head!

See two smart alecky redheaded kids annoy the hell out of everyone in the theater! (one has a bullhorn)

Bad Movie Night Borg9 Night Poseidon Adventure, The

Sunday October 30th

8pm

$5

----/ Event Description /-----------------------------------------------

It's another Borg9 Punk Smashing Extravaganza with
Ernest and all his friends in The Poseidon Adventure.
How many continuity errors can you spot? Free popcorn to whoever picks out the most!

Tonights movie smashing punks are Geekboy, Pete Goldie
and yes.... Dr. Hal!

Fair Warning(also known as Upcoming Films)

Nov 6th Next of Kin
With hosts
Sean Owens, Jim Fourniadis,

Nov 13th Dr. of Doom
With hosts
Geekboy, Stoo Odom, Jim Fourniadis

Nov 20th Tommy
With hosts
Rhiannon, Alexia, John

Nov 27th Dragnet (1954)
With hosts
Sherilyn Connelly, Mykel Board and Jim Fourniadis

Dec 4th Pearl Harbor
Mikl-Em, Stuart Mangrum, Sherilyn Connely

Dec 11th Bride of the Gorilla
Geekboy, Mikl-Em, Jim Fourniadis

Dec 18th It's a Wonderful Life
With hosts
Sean Owens, Sherilyn Connelly, Jim Fourniadis

Jan 8th tba
The Cock T's

----/ Venue Info /------------------------------------------------------

The Dark Room Theatre
2263 Mission st.
San Francisco
415-401-7987
www.darkroomsf.com

on mission between 19th and 18th streets, between the pawn shop and the laundromat, 3 blks from the 16th street bart station

----/ Additional Info /-------------------------------------------------

wsup@darkroomsf.com
415-401-7987
www.darkroomsf.com

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

Chicken Soup For the Soul

2005-10-12T20:50:30Z

It was quite the drubbing. Borg9 must be smiling right now. A punk definitely got smashed, or at least severely soaked last night. At some point I found myself lifting a heathen above my head while Chicken's flimsy security tried to contain the barbarians. I felt like Maciste minus the loincloth.

Now, if this was Great Leap Forward China and Chicken was Chairman Mao, what would be the correct way to write the news piece?

posted in borg9 - 3 replies

Everybody's favorite Brazilian...

2005-10-05T02:16:42Z

http://tribes.tribe.net/kiko

posted in borg9 - 25 replies

Maybe I am wrong...

2005-10-01T03:42:35Z

but didn't borg9 get smashed last night?

posted in borg9 - 13 replies

Why doesn't somebody do something?

2005-09-30T02:39:25Z

http://looterguy.com/lootergallery1.htm

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

the price of freedom is eternal vigilance

2005-09-29T22:18:14Z

> -----Original Message-----
> From: Human Resources [mailto:hr@pacificfertility.com]
> Sent: Wednesday, September 28, 2005 05:14 PM
> To: josh@orangeboxman.com
> Subject: RE:
>
> Josh,
>
> I want to thank you for bringing thiserror to my attention. The wage
> indicated has been corrected to state $8.62per hour.
>
> Best regards,
> John Hamilton
>
>
> John C. Hamilton
> Controller
> PacificFertilityCenter
> 55 Francisco Street, Suite 300
> San Francisco, CA94133
> direct: 415.249.3667
> main: 415.834.3000
> fax: 415.834.3025
> www.infertilitydoctor.com
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------
>
> This message may contain confidentialand/or privileged information. If you
> are not the intended recipient orauthorized to receive this for the
> intended recipient, you must not use, copy,disclose or take any action
> based on this message or any informationherein. If you have received this
> message in error, please advise thesender immediately by sending a reply
> e-mail and delete thismessage. Thank you for your cooperation.
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------
>
> From:josh@orangeboxman.com [mailto:josh@orangeboxman.com]
> Sent: Wednesday, September 28,2005 2:06 PM
> To:Human Resources
> Subject:
>
>
> http://www.craigslist.org/sfc/ofc/100525197.html
>
> I couldn't help noticing that your Craigslist ad offers sub-minimum wage
> for the City of San Francisco.
>
> How do you expect to get away with this?

posted in borg9 - 3 replies

BORG9 MOVIE NIGHT - SUNDAY! SUNDAY! SUNDAY!

2005-09-25T19:11:57Z

Despite the erroneous posting by Ty (what does she know anyway), the movie this Sunday September 25th will be...

....wait for it....

**** THE VIKINGS ****

starring ERNEST BORG9!!!!!

... plus a few other contract actors, including Michael Douglas's father and Jamie Leigh Curtis's father and, by a very weird coincidence, Jamie Leigh Curtis's mother too!

Yup, we're trading in the togas this week for animal skins, helmets with horns and LOTS of MEAD! And that stuff will fuck you up, 'eh Don?

Yer hosts are finally Pete Goldie!, Geekboy and of course.....Jim Fourniadis

Sunday September 25th 8pm

Bad Movie Night
@
The Dark Room Theatre
2263 Mission st.
btwn 18th and 19th
5$

We ’ve taken all the guess work out of the age ole question, “Will this movie suck? ”

It will suck.

And we ’ll have a slew of hosts to point that out. Every Sunday for a measly 5$ you can put your feet up, enjoy a crummy movie, scarf down popcorn, listen to the hilarious ravings of our special guests and yes, you too can
yell at the movie screen.

We will have rotating hosts chosen from the brilliant comedic flock of freaks circling our fair city. Guaranteed bad movies. Byob. Free popcorn. Feet on the furniture. What more could you ask for of a Sunday night. We promise to have you in bed by 11pm.

Sept 25th
The Vikings
Geekboy, Pete Goldie, JF

posted in borg9 - 7 replies

this is freaking me out in a good way

2005-09-22T02:14:33Z

http://www.1st-ave-machine.com/video/anime.htm

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

Monkeynomics

2005-09-20T18:18:32Z

All Hail Our Supreme Leader, Smash Punks, Art Critic For Life, blah, blah blah.

Now that we're done with the formalities, let's talk about something dear to me.

Whoring Monkeys.

http://losangeles.tribe.net/template/pub%2Coc%2CDetail.vm?plugin=blog&topicid=d1ba059d-56f7-4170-a634-6861d4d5603b&inst=1247408&r=10025

posted in borg9 - 4 replies

Trip Report

2005-09-19T19:06:50Z

In the name of the Supreme Art Critic For Life, I went to that Orgy of Depravity out in the desert to convert the heathens. But they were already were running on biodiesel (the fuel of choice of the Hippy Space Program).

These are the horrors I witnessed.
http://people.tribe.net/drfiasco/blog?r=10025&topicId=b89607cf-ebdd-4e43-b48b-7b9658d6d0f5

posted in borg9 - 5 replies

good time @ a bad party

2005-09-10T19:01:38Z

"i have played w/fire and been burned...
and will play again."

"if u meet urself on the road...
burn urself down."

mateo
post bm, 1998
(from a post to the diox list entitled: "it's not all good")

posted in borg9 - 5 replies

So...

2005-09-10T18:44:18Z

...I gave away all my earthly possessions and spent a whole goddamned week frying my brain under the desert sun, drinking beer coated with dust and putting up with thump thump to my right and hyperbad punk rock to my left.

All this just so I could bear witness to the Great Smashing that would be visited upon the Unbelieving.

And yet, nothing happened.

Have I interpreted the Scriptures maybe a bit too literally?

posted in borg9 - 3 replies

I am off

2005-08-30T06:44:48Z

To the desert, to preach and convert the infidels, and visit great smashings on they who refuse the Teachings of The Supreme Art Critic for Life, may He bless us and gives us a sure fist.

I shall mount a rickety Ford Explorer and make my way across the mountains and onto the Great Basin, with a 12 ft wall of fire to impress on the unbelieving the Glory of Borg9.

If I don't come back in 10 days, send backup and/or bail money.

May the Smashing be with you

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

I gotta say

2005-08-27T08:34:28Z

Sure I have been indulging in extreme slack here. Who could blame me.
Once I felt everything was comfortably stumbling forward, I kicked back and relaxed. But I do have to say, that Ant Rock City shizzle kicks it in the groin.
Kudos to your sir.

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

What happened?

2005-08-27T08:31:50Z

Did you guys give up?

That's just impossibly sad. I own a taser gun in case any of you want to borrow it.

posted in borg9 - 7 replies

just because

2005-08-25T11:13:14Z

http://www.nipponham.co.jp/winny/kazari/

posted in borg9 - 22 replies

Disgusting Spectacle vs. Colossus

2005-08-12T23:30:43Z

@ Nimby

Colossus may be big, well engeneered, interesting, and well funded...but do they have a glow-in-the-dark bowtie?....no

Sure Colossus will suspend 30 odd tons of stone in mid air and let you spin 'em around like they were made of chickenwire....but our picking hand *IS* made outta chickenwire...and it kinda spins too...

Oh yeah, we have it ALL OVER those Colossus chumps. Come compair for yerself on SUNDAY at 5p.m. & after.

Nimby is in west oakland,,,1649 28ths ST. @ Peralta.
Good if you have a car... a haul from the W. Oakland Bart.

I'll strap you into a hamster wheel....

Take care,
Tracy

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

center square

2005-08-08T20:16:39Z

http://www.classicsquares.com/squarefacts.html

posted in borg9 - 4 replies

An event worth smashi-, er, crashing?

2005-08-03T03:39:28Z

Borg2 "Meet The Artists" -- SAturday Night
Don't forget ........

BORG2's "Meet The Artists" night is this Saturday, Aug 6, starting at 10 p.m. at Soluna Cafe & Lounge in S.F. ... All of the local Borg2-funded artists have agreed to attend and bring a special representation of their project (uhm, no fire in the restaurant, ok?). This is going to be a very special evening ....

A special reception in honor of our very own visionaries begins at 10 pm, with desserts, hot & cold hors d'oveours, and a change to meet and mingle ...

At 11 pm, we'll loosen up with bossa nova beats and other treats ...

Then at midnight, Ryel K. of Pink Mammoth fame takes the turntables so you can move your feet till 2 a.m. ....

Sugested donations are $10 - $40 ... but come out and tell us your sad story and see how cheap you can get in ...

TICKETS AVAILABLE NOW at www.borg2benefit.com

We're getting promises of good publicity from a bunch of community sources, and little hint of a buzz is developing ... But the restaurant has a finite capacity, and it would be whacked to turn away people who've been committed to this experiment all along ...

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

My heat induced hallucinations and visions

2005-07-28T11:38:57Z

Mecha-Godzilla vs. Raving Burners

This is one of those very special movie episodes where the anti-Godzilla changes hats and becomes one of the good guys. DPW volunteers heading back from Double Hot Springs notice large impressions in the playa and believe them to be old burn scars. Pan back and we see that they are really saurian footprints. Since nobody in their drug induced stupor has noticed a robotic version of Godzilla made by either aliens or a joint US-Japanese consortium (this is never resolved in the movie and is left for a sequal) roving the hillsides, Burning Man (tm) continues unabated. Mecha-Godzilla lured and offended by the scent of patchouli spoiling the pristine desert environment he has called home for several weeks seeks the befouling source for eradication. Hilarity and hijinx ensue! Cameo appearance by Godzilla at the end of the movie toasting Mecha-Godzilla's win over absolute evil.

In the version dubbed for American audiences, Ernest Borgnine plays a reporter who is investigating the building of a nearby coal plant. It is assumed that this is what originally brought Mecha-Godzilla to the desert. The actual reason is that Mecha-Godzilla is a shy opal addict. Who knew?

posted in borg9 - 11 replies

ernest control

2005-07-28T11:22:43Z

http://mrl.nyu.edu/~perlin/experiments/emotive-actors/

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

circling the drain...

2005-07-15T20:36:34Z

dis trite dont even generate enough digi-hot air to merit a joining of forces.

http://battleborg.tribe.net/?_click_path=Application%5Btribe%5D.Tribe%5Ba6d301e8-8d5f-43f0-80e2-fb5021246559%5D&r=10535

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

Quick! Turn on AMC this morning.

2005-07-14T17:00:02Z

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/6301996100.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

posted in borg9 - 21 replies

Spies and Stalkers

2005-07-14T03:45:54Z

Why did you fuckers erase my story from yesterday? Was it too nasty? Am I out of line again? Are you just going to keep ignoring me and erasing me until I go away? Am I a pain in your ass?

I FUCKING HOPE SO!

With all my love and due respect.

Anyhoo, I thought I would share my latest inspiration with you and since my story from yesterday no longer exsists, I am no longer bound by any of the silly shit I may have said.

THE RULES OF STALKING

1. When stalking someone, it is very important not to piss them off, especially if they have multiple personalities or the ability to coordinate a large group of people under the same information. They could be really mean and turn your good-natured stalking against you and tell people about things you may have said, that you would not want other people to know you said.

2. Practice stalking someone stupid first.

3. Never stalk someone who is far more intelligent and experienced then you are.

4. Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they are not watching.

5. If you are actually a stalker you will not go tell the person you are stalking that you are stalking them.

6. If you accuse everyone of being spies, they might not want to play with you.

7. If you threaten to shoot everyone, they might not want to play with you.

8. When you live in a world of stalkers and spies everything fits, even if it was not designed to fit. Everything is important and somehow, everything is relavant to some grand conspiracy. You start to pay attention and care... to the best of your ability.

9. Find someone to stalk and be wothy of spies. May your life and the lives of others be interesting to you.

Ahhhh.... I'm touched by me. I think I will start stalking myself. That way I will always know where I am and what I'm doing and I am unlikely to make myself jelous or hurt my own feelings.

and fuck you too

posted in borg9 - 11 replies

BORG9 to the Orkin man, please come in.....

2005-07-05T18:50:08Z

I for one welcome our insect overlords.....

http://bangalore.tribe.net/template/pub%2CViewPhoto.vm/context/person?page=1&currentoffset=0&parentid=4ef12d1b-92c6-4a1f-91fe-f9cc3c0328fb&sortby&rows&r=10503

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

So there's this woman

2005-07-05T18:39:03Z

That says that my attitudes set back femalekind like fifty years or so.

I'd say that's a pretty remarkable feat for someone who can't normally string more than three words together without recall lapse, eh?

posted in borg9 - 19 replies

Necessary mid-course correct during cruise phase

2005-07-05T18:25:24Z

I'm confused. So much going on right now, from suggestive gangbang memoirs, to the new slogan at Dennys... "If we don't drop the dime on you within 10 minutes of your order, the missing child is on us!". Why am I so distracted? Is it the anxiety of the Deep Impact mission missing it's goal? Is it the haircut I'm suppose to get today? Is it from cheating on my taxes, then getting a letter from the IRS that says "you paid too much, can we please send you an additional refund?".

Nope.

It's because I have not found time for borg9.

borg9. He, who without the slightest effort, smashed all other borgs. He who raised more art awareness than a petri dish full of mutant da Vinci stem cells. He who makes my teeth whiter and my colors brighter.

borg9.

borg9.

borg9.

posted in borg9 - 5 replies

my novel

2005-07-04T21:38:04Z

http://famouslibrarian.com/Harriet_Incandenza.html

rips apart at the flesh

you're so vain harriet guess they wrote a song about you

posted in borg9 - 6 replies

So.....

2005-07-04T01:37:43Z

What's going on here?

posted in borg9 - 16 replies

I just can't help it

2005-07-01T19:51:32Z

I went to Smith and that college is reputed for flirtation.

morcheeba

posted in borg9 - 1 reply

it's another geekboy sunday at bad movie night

2005-06-30T08:56:11Z

independence day

i'm just going to apoligize now for filling your evening with crap.

i know that's the job of bad movie night but i can't help feeling.... bad.

very very bad

and dirty yeah dirty

bad movie night..... good

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

badmovie.tribe.net

2005-06-15T19:49:47Z

Enough already, I converted one of my stagnant tribes into something relevent. You may already be a member. Go find the tribe called

"Darkroom Bad Movie Night "

That's where to go for further discussion about Sunday nights at the Dark Room.

Leave now or be smashed.

posted in borg9 - 3 replies

not getting enough geekboy

2005-06-13T22:19:20Z

get your geekboy fix this sunday

cuz there's no such thing as too much geekboy

Bad Movie Night
Sundays 8pm at the Dark Room Theatre

Hercules vs. The MoonMen

Hercules.

That's right.

I'm talking Son of Zeus. Ant the MoonMen? Who thought this would be a good idea? Kind of like ketchup on cat litter. Revolting

Geekboy will be verbally sparing with Dr. Hal and the always hilarious Jim Fourniadis.

Here's the official info

Sunday June 5th 8pm
@
The Dark Room Theatre
2263 Mission st.
btwn 18th and 19th
5$

posted in borg9 - 26 replies

the decline o borg9...

2005-06-09T20:02:13Z

...and so all the hot air blown bout smashing punks devolves into petty discourse on da humidity o geekboy...or something...

posted in borg9 - 4 replies

The Rise of borg9

2005-06-09T20:01:30Z

We won! Again!

http://www.aumond.com/results.html

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

Humble moments

2005-06-06T06:19:26Z

I had a humble moment. I am very vain about my writing. I think my writing is good. But I need to listen to people more when the criticize me. Okay off to terrorize the Buddhists.

http://sanfrancisco.tribe.net/tribe/bb6aeb20-f101-4846-8865-c391b38591b2?_click_path=Application%5Btribe%5D.Tribe%5Bbb6aeb20-f101-4846-8865-c391b38591b2%5D&r=10535

I am trying to start a flash stream of consciousness mob, go over to Bloggers if you want to hear more.

http://sanfrancisco.tribe.net/tribe/b62896b5-e70a-4048-a400-141ede9af7da?_click_path=Application%5Btribe%5D.Tribe%5Bb62896b5-e70a-4048-a400-141ede9af7da%5D&r=10535

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

RE: WHERE'S MY FUCKING MONEY graphic

2005-05-25T19:42:46Z

Dearest poster of non-BORG9 related graphic.

A DarkRoom lackey in a Habitrail does not a dollar make.

Please be advised that such abuse of the arts is taken very seriously in this town. Not that you can tell, but it's out there.

posted in borg9 - 0 replies

borg9 Art Grant - Award Announcement

2005-05-25T16:36:33Z

What you've all been waiting for...

http://laughingsquid.com/2005/05/23/borg9-art-grant/

posted in borg9 - 11 replies

VH1 has stolen Borg9

2005-05-24T00:52:59Z

On vh1's show best week ever,they talked about a robot(shown in a picture of a robot body with ernests head superimposed onto it)and called it BorgNine,claiming it is voiced by Ernest himself.....theivery or tribute?you decide.

posted in borg9 - 4 replies

BORG2 BULLHORN #17: Jim's Bullhorn

2005-05-20T23:21:43Z

The BORG2 Bullhorn (B2B): No. 17, 5/20/05

-========================================================-
BORG2 Info: http://www.BORG2.org
BORG2 Discussion: http://BORG2.tribe.net
BORG2 Email List and Voter Registration
http://saucer.spaceship.com/mailman/listinfo/bep
BORG2 Art Fund Donations: http://www.BORG2.org/Donate.html
-========================================================-

-------------->your agenda for this week<-----------------

{ THE STATE OF THE BORG2 }
{ THE STATE OF THE MONEY IN THE BORG2 }

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

THE STATE OF THE BORG2, a not so regular announcement by Jim Mason (who has Mr. Jones well wrapped and safely stored in the back room for a few moments)

In the beginning, someone or another said . . .

"The BORG2 plans to set up various structures so we can elect committees that can intern appoint councils to study the situation and propose additional committees that divide into subcommittees, with chairs, presidents, secretaries, and treasurers, requiring oversight from an as of yet undefined assembled body of experts that will advise and endure the committee that was elected to do all of this in the first place. Out of this, we are quite certain, will come Art."

. . . and amazingly enough, 5 months later all of this has happened, and we have, in fact, arrived at Art. A huge pile of it to be exact. Look here and be impressed and inspired. http://www.borg2.org/artProposals.php3. Good Lord there is a lot of it.

Yes, the path to here has been brutal.

The BORG2 has waddled through a slough of bureaucratic despond, hacked through forests of malaise and confusion, and generally wasted for thirst in a parched desert of raving and electronica, to the astonishment of all. But now we have emerged again, back at the Art that we originally set out to do this with.

In the beginning, the BORG2 rose up to make Burning Man about the ART again. That we *even* had to argue this point is a bit pathetic. But in fact, we did. The issue of the centrality of art in this high minded civic experiment out on the flat earth is, in fact, at issue.

We started this by stating the obvious: that Burning Man has wandered from its foundation in ART and we didn't want its unique creative glories to slide any further into a decadent dirt rave. That we wanted the propagation of this experiment to be more than a vague party network. That COLLABORATIVE CREATIVE WORK, BROADLY DEFINED, WAS AND IS OUR MAIN VEHICLE TOWARDS COMMUNITY.

This notion seemed to get everyone quite excited. Lots of people jumped up and down a whole bunch for a couple months. But then it got kinda quiet. And that seemed to be about it.

We didn't hear much from borg1 either. Yes, they upped the art budget by $200,000 in response to all the hoo hah, loosened the thematic and interactivity requirements, and brought in some extra curators. This was all great and in the direction requested, and we thank them profusely for it. Asses were well covered, wounds were bandaged, and something was done to improve the situation. But still, there was no clear statement about the PRIMACY of creative work at the event and in its propagation outward. No one stood up and said, “let’s go there” or “this is what we are about”. It still seems left to be about anything, in the hope that it will be about everything, for everyone, but in reality threatens to become about nothing with so little core and clarity of purpose.

That core, we have said clearly, is art. That is our method and our tool. What we had before, and what we want to move forward with again, are the deep and meaningful ties formed in the crucible of WILDLY COLLABORATIVE ART-MAKING, in the harshest of conditions, challenged constantly by our inexperience, inability and lack of resources, but ultimately realized by the people that join together to make it happen anyway.

Into this vacuum of leadership on the art question has now stepped many individuals with great projects that want to have a go at it. The list at http://www.borg2.org/artProposals.php3 has reinspired me and everyone else I know who has looked at it. And the resulting discussion at http://borg2.tribe.net is proving that the public posting and review of art ideas is an excellent tool for inspiration, collaboration and resource sharing towards the cooperative manifestation of art.

Over the next couple weeks the Art Council and Guest Curators will be preparing and packaging these proposals for public consideration and voting. We invite you to join the process and help refine the projects with us at http://borg2.tribe.net . And after that, help us build them.

After that we are sure many trucks of dubious mechanical veracity will appear to haul them over the Sierras and Great Basin, from many directions, towards unknown ends.

Who is driving this long train of trucks and where it is going, we are not really sure. But *not* knowing is usually more interesting than knowing in the end.

That is, afterall, where all of this started.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

THE STATE OF THE MONEY IN THE BORG2

OR

THE BORG2 ART FUND: Spare Changing our way to 250,000 DIMES.

Yea. Yea, i know. We said we were gong to raise $250,000 dollars. But we are artists. Sometimes we don't do what we say we are going to do. Often we do more, like 110% or 1100%. But when it comes to money, we often do only 10%, but deliver 110% nonetheless.

So that is what we are now going to do here. The BORG2 now commits to raise 250,000 in DIMES. $250,000 DOLLARS was WAY too much. And we like change anyway, honey coated or not. It's become a bit of a theme around here.

We already have 150,000 DIMES ($15,000). We only need 100,000 DIMES more to reach our new (and more reasonable) goal. We plan to distribute the 250,000 DIMES ($25,000) in grants in amounts between 1k and 5k. No, these will not be any 20k sugar daddy art grants. But 5k is still a TON of money by historic burning man standards. Much has been done by many for less, or zero for that matter.

But to get to $25,000, we very much need your help.

ALL of the $15,000 current dollars have come from individuals like you and me, giving a couple dollars here and there. Many of these small dollars and smaller coins bundled together has summed to $15,000. Our only large donor (the $25,000 pledge) backed out after Chicken insulted fat old people that like to snuggle in domes. Be careful who you insult. Especially if your name is Chicken John. So now it is back up to us. And for us, the financially dubious and irresponsible, we propose something simple and we hope effective.

We call it the: "ONE BURRITO AND ONE BEER" pledge program.

Here's how it works.

You are poor (or at least not used to giving money away) like the rest of us. But you are used to eating and drinking beer, like the rest of us. In fact, you do it all the time. It’s real easy. So we propose a simple slight of mind (or hand).

We ask you to consider giving the BORG2 "ONE BURRITO AND ONE BEER" a month, for each of the next 4 months until the event. One burrito and one beer is about 10 bucks. If you do that every month, that will be 40 bucks total by the event, and you won’t barely even feel it. You just say "yes", pay $10 via paypal or snail mail, and we'll send you an email each month to remind you.

If we ask you for 40 bucks right now you won't even consider it most likely. But if we ask you for "one burrito and one beer", leaving you with the salsa and chips, you might actually pause to consider it. You might even consider it to the point of CLICKING HERE (http://www.borg2.org/donate.php3) or sending an email to jimmason @ longnow .org that says "OK fine, you get the burrito and the beer, I’ll keep the salsa and chips". It's that easy.

Now of course, you can give more. You might consider a "Pollo en Mole Especial Con Margarita", which is about 20 bucks a month, or you might consider the dinner for everyone "Tacos Para La Familia" which is about 50 a month, or even margaritas for the whole bar, which if reasonable size, is about 100 a month.

But those other options are for the special people. The regular people, like you and me, we just give "ONE BURRITO AND ONE BEER". That’s all.

If 200 people do this, with a couple opting for the "Pollo en Mole Especial" or "Tacos Para Todos" options, etc, we will easily raise the remaining $10,000 needed.

But this only works if YOU, yes you, do it.

Only by the bundling of MANY small donations can be built a BIG pile. There are WAY more than 200 of us. In fact, there are 1500 on this list. If EVERYONE on this list gave "ONE BURRITO AND ONE BEER", we would have $60,000 + the $15,000 in hand for a total of $75,000. That’s a lot of money for art. That’s at least 20 projects, well funded.

MANY SMALL DONATIONS BUNDLED TOGETHER *DO* MAKE A DIFFERENCE.

And really, you are only giving money to yourself to give away anyway, as you get to vote where it goes in the end. Think of it as a personalized art giving program, with the currency being Mexican food.

Because after all, if there were no burritos to survive on, there would be no art underground in San Francisco. What all of you survive on elsewhere I have no idea.

Jim Mason thanks you very much for reading and considering.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The stuff on the bottom from Frank, now unwrapped and safely back at his seat.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Questions? Complaints? Unsolicited manuscripts? Push the button and TALK LOUDLY: Frankenstein Jones at (b2bullhorn@fastmail.fm).

Got an event coming up or an announcement to make? Send them in. We can't guarantee everything submitted will appear in an issue of the b2b, however we will make every effort to accommodate your sincere desire to yell at the general public. PLEASE SEND ME INFORMATION. I can't do this without the people who read the thing.

You can also sign up for the tribe.net thingy at
http://BORG2.tribe.net, where we talk about all sorts of stuff related to BORG2. This is probably the quickest way to receive information and inform others on topics related to BORG2.

"Please get me off this list as quickly as possible."

Ejection seat button:
http://saucer.spaceship.com/mailman/listinfo/bep

Go down the page until you see the part that begins with "To
unsubscribe". Enter your email address and that should effectively get you out of the loop. You will no longer be eligible to take part in future BORG2 votes after you take this step, although you are welcome to re-subscribe at any time.

Frankenstein Jones, Not Dead Yet
Office of the People Without Offices
http://www.BORG2.org

Mahalo.

_______________________________________________
BEP mailing list
BEP@saucer.spaceship.com
http://saucer.spaceship.com/mailman/listinfo/bep

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

RIGGED: the event (call for art)

2005-05-16T06:09:48Z

The Shipyard and Mobilization/F-Space hereby announce our annual summer picnic soiree- the "How to Destroy the Universe" festival (Part IV).

This year we have on bill, as usual, a gigantic Ontological disaster, setting up and knocking down the pins of Being (big "B") with over two days and nights of curiously compelling mayhem.

The first day of the festival will be a show I've been wanting to do for three years, but have demurred on for various reasons at various times. We are finally saying "go" on this, but need many of you to join us to make it work. The show is called:

"RIGGED: An Arbitrary Assembly of Airborne Aesthetic Curiosities"

The notion is an event/exhibition where all the art is somehow up in the air. Everyone is invited to propose projects and performance ideas that are aerial in one manner or another. Open submission. Anything considered. Only rule is- nothing can touch the ground.

We will do lots of rigging with cables across the yard between container knuckles, making 17’ high hanging points. Things/people can climb on the sides of the containers. Mount things on tall poles. Things can be kinetic or be still. Fill the entire overhead space of the yard with aerial art and enjoy it / destroy it from below.

We might get things like larnie's bamboo birds. 1000 origami swans contending for airspace. Run scott flame tubes around the container top perimeter. Make an big ice teradactyl that drips big rocks as it melts. Have david apocalypse do his straight jacket escape hanging from the boom truck bucket, 40' in the air. Yet another Aesthetic Meat Front hook suspension. Zip line rockets. 100' long "violin" strings, played from below. Flying pigs, burning. Maybe a trapeze performance on the sides of the containers. An opera performance in the round on the tops of the containers. And i'm sure a bunch of other things i can't think of. Nay, we may even get a new and improved Ryon eye arch, but shhhhh . . .

I don't know. I just like the title of it. "rigged". It has a nice ring to it, don't you think?

Previous starts at this event have produced many installation and performance proposals. Hopefully those of you who were interested before are still interested. For we are now, in reality, not be altered, changed, folded, bent, spindled, vexed or mutilated, going to do this as announced- last weekend in June.

So please write me if you want to discuss making things for the show or helping to organize it. There is modest money available for installations and performances. Ask and you shall receive, most likely.

The second day of the HTDTU Festival will be more musically focused. More info to follow. The rigged day is likely mostly physical art. Both days should combine to create a good shaking of the seat.

This will be the main Shipyard show this summer. The Power Tool Drag Races have been moved to October for a variety of reasons. So other than the dirt rave in the desert, we hope your calendar is clear enough that you can join us to assemble some unusual curiosities, airborne in nature, late this coming June.

Thanks for considering.

Jim

posted in borg9 - 8 replies

It is worth noting...

2005-05-11T12:30:23Z

... that the current lead graphic at the woo woo ha ha tribe is among the better one of the borg9 art grant proposals. Their cult-like mob ignorance to the descending fists and raining anvils is profound.

Meanwhile, The Hand of borg9 gently strokes a small golden anvil and smiles in quiet satisfaction.

posted in borg9 - 8 replies

Contact!: bogey bearing linkyzero(borg)9er

2005-05-07T16:27:43Z

unauthorized bmorg relat activity dis sector:

http://ukraine.tribe.net/tribe/5c2a2995-be02-4534-8049-85e15d491798?r=10535

posted in borg9 - 7 replies

Borg2 Art Project

2005-05-05T12:58:10Z

The BORG9 Chicken John Dunk Booth

Complete with piranhas, crocodiles and polyamorous burner leaches.

If someone can produce the imagery for this, the invisible Hand of Smashing that guided The Leader to a smashing victory in the elections shall make the webpagery seen to all.

posted in borg9 - 21 replies

It's not like there are rules, but the concept should be easy to grasp.

2005-05-03T23:04:45Z

Criteria for posting shit in the photo gallery.

1. Must contain some reference to the glorious leader.
2. Should contain the word borg9 in some fashion.
3. Good idea if it said something like "I'm going to smash you punks"

Those last two images that were added met none of these and they sucked.
Thus they were smashed into oblivion. Join some other tribe if you want to post your abstract wankery. This tribe is for the glorification of all that is BORG9. If you don't get that, you're fucking stupid.

Worship no other borg before him.

Ahem.

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

BORG9 Field Trip

2005-05-03T16:44:49Z

http://sanfrancisco.tribe.net/listing/096431d3-deee-4216-9d48-80f0df5b2907?r=10535

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

How many SF borg9 members does it take to screw

2005-04-27T05:57:43Z

ok, it really isn't a question about that. What I would like to know is of 70 how many live here in SF/BayArea. I am too lazy to go through and count.
First person to give me an accurate number wins a nifty Borg9 iron on that they can apply to their cleanest article of clothing. The prize can be collected at the DarkRoom this Sunday before the showing of "Devil's Rain". I might even have some new stickers.

Don't ask how I will know if the count is accurate. I will know. What I am hoping to find out is if it will be possible to sell out the room. After the 45 seats I think it becomes SRO.

posted in borg9 - 34 replies

Why we must smash!

2005-04-27T05:56:50Z

http://sanfrancisco.tribe.net/listing/8e139d5c-af16-47ae-bd0c-71d447e9494e?r=10535

posted in borg9 - 14 replies

not borg9 related

2005-04-25T19:04:41Z

but i've taken up the writing challenge with sean kelly on his writing challenge tribe and i've decided in the next 10 days to write my pops story.

it's a facinating read.

cop a glance if yer bored.

http://sanfrancisco.tribe.net/thread/d483a79e-6444-4c1e-ae8d-3673f4f4258b?tribeid=ad4e485a-cd16-43e9-96ae-3481d1aadd9e&r=10535

posted in borg9 - 6 replies

waiting to smash...

2005-04-13T21:44:12Z

*yawn*

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

Membership Stats

2005-04-12T00:21:51Z

With the acceptance of dattner into the warm crushing embrace of borg9, the cult has achieved 70 members. Only 30 to go until we can apply for our private club liquor license.

One very encouraging sign that borg9 accolates are superior specimens is that we have created and shared 73 enlightening graphics that proclaim the Greatness of borg9. Such an outpouring of creativity cannot help but shout into the Bullhorn of Truth.

Let the ignorant cower before borg9!

posted in borg9 - 7 replies

Let the fists of smashing rejoice and come together for his glory.

2005-04-09T05:22:03Z

Uh Sunday April 24th we will gather for glorious uplifting of the Borg9 as
Bad Movie Night at the Dark Room {http://www.darkroomsf.com/} presents "Devils Rain"{ http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0072869/} in spectacular Smell-O-Vision.

Ok it ain't in Smell-O-Vision, but I will be up front helping the vision of Borg9 be lifted up in to shiny beatification. Ty is going to have to help me remember who else will be on the guest panel of miscreants in the front. So far I think it includes Stuart Mangrum and Jim? Bud Ugly? Someone.

It promises to be funny as hell as Borg9 shows that he is our true master. Leap in fright at the terror of a shirtless Shatner screaming in pain as he is smashed unto with extreme smashfistedness.

Wonder what the hell is wrong with yourself for never having seent his movie before. Bring a bullhorn and a sack full of juice.

Mark it on your calendars now. Sure seventeen days is advanced warning.

posted in borg9 - 4 replies

The good work continues; smash on

2005-04-08T15:08:06Z

I am daily amused and enthused by the campaign to glorification.

But there is a touch of upset in my midsection for the lack of showing of the borg9 faithful last night. A few key players and diligent members, but I figured a packed house of followers. I guess my reclusive cult leader powers are not as potent as I might have thought. No worries, I have already mentioned the need to take on Devils Rain at Bad Movie Night at the DarkRoom. We can smash the punks. And the first best method will be through the inebriated bellowing in tongues of the church hierarchy.

Therefore the holy disk must be recovered from KROB. I am looking in your general direction Bud Ugly. Much prodding of the Darkroom must ensue to ensure a slot soon. Holy waters must be secured for spirit inducing through the holy livers. And there should be bullhorns, many glory proclaiming bullhorns......

posted in borg9 - 4 replies

kids in sopport o smashing

2005-04-06T23:24:06Z

http://sanfrancisco.tribe.net/thread/6fcd1bcc-c4ff-410f-8136-b92117ac3878?tribeid=81b361a8-7976-4964-9dc1-9ce3cd691b3c&newpostingid=625e4bb3-779f-4b5a-83ab-d489fd7b975b&r=10535#625e4bb3-779f-4b5a-83ab-d489fd7b975b

posted in borg9 - 2 replies

Who is behind the current "anvil" campaign?

2005-04-04T16:42:55Z

Simply brilliant.

posted in borg9 - 10 replies

joint letter to borg9

2005-04-02T10:11:41Z

as control freak in charge o 2 o da outer borg zone trites[bm:bmorg101 and bullshitborg] what would borg9 have me do w/them?
i will boot any members borg9 wishs.

may i offer bullshitborg as a battle ground wherein we(dthe golden glut ...imean cult o smashdom.) draw the enemey and have a realy good smash.

posted in borg9 - 15 replies

Out from my secret lair

2005-03-30T22:13:13Z

There is all truth to the rumor that I will be making myself public for the Bad Movie Night at the Dark Room. I looked at their calendar and can't confirm that I will be there April 3. Please do no ask me for stickers, iron ons, beer, money or bacon flavored sodas. I will have none on hand. But do come out in droves to bemoan the lack of Borg9 in the film. This will be my first public foray in what seems like many years. Think of Howard Hughes taking his first night out from the compound. My finger nails are so long it took over an hour to type this.

Check out http://www.darkroomsf.com/ for particulars. It is not upgraded for next weekend so I could just be imagining the whole thing. Certainly it could not have been gubmint agents sending me spam that I misinterpreted.

posted in borg9 - 7 replies

Darwinism in the name of BORG9

2005-03-25T06:57:33Z

I have been noticing the other little borgs have little to say these days. Perhaps it is time to go unto them and get with the smashing. Something like a nice firm offer for them to join forces with us and put down their water weak borgs.

Although I do believe that folding their membership into our own would only slightly raise the head count here.

Worship no borg before me! - the venerable BORG9

posted in borg9 - 16 replies